A moment with Jovie Sumner
BOTG: Your book ‘My Brothers & I’ truly expressed a sense of brotherhood that in this day and age, one could say is hard to create. I’ve got to ask, what does Brotherhood mean to you?
JS: Your welcome, I love BOTG!
Man to me, brotherhood is all about men coming together, to help one another out. It means loyalty above all else, and also being able to stand on the mutual principles we share as men.
BOTG: What do you think are the qualities that create and reinforces a bunch of very close friends to be a brotherhood?
JS: Well it can be a lot of things. For example in the book (My Brothers & I: Jealousy Is As Cruel As The Grave) all of the characters were fun loving, and played the game of life to win! The addiction to the game was the one thing that they all had in common, even though that’s not what the focal point of the book is. Another quality that helps create a great brotherhood is just going through different things as men. For example all but one of the characters in My Brothers & I: Jealousy Is As Cruel As The Grave grew up without a father, so for those characters in particular with the exception of Quincy that was one of the connecting points for the brothers. It was a sense of these guys coming together to get what they didn’t have. Be it money, love, brotherhood, or anything else. I think for most men and women we tend to connect with people who have something that we can relate to or that we admire, or may feel that we’re missing in our own lives. For example in the book the character known as ‘Money Black’ who is the ultimate hustler of the bunch is not quite as callous or hardcore as one would think. I would say that he had a need to play big brother to the rest of the crew, just as much as Quincy had a need to have an older brother to learn from and idolize ‘Money like Black’.
BOTG: What inspired you to write this book?
JS: The inspiration for the book just came from seeing people’s true colors in life. You know an Og told me once that when people show you who they are to believe em. So just being around long enough to see and experience different things in life that people go through inspired me to tell the tale.
BOTG: Can you still do flips? Could Big Earl, still flip at he’s size? Could Daryl?
JS: I was never much of a flipper personally, but the story’s main character Quincy actually got pretty good at it. Big Earl’s character stopped flipping once he really got into the weights, but he was actually pretty good too. Darryl was a monster when it came to flipping! There again he just had that natural swagger, he could flip everything from chicks to bricks! He really was just that guy!
BOTG: If you were tease for being the sweet boy, how is it that Daryl was getting all the ladies?…lol
JS: Man let me tell you every last one of those brothers was lethal when it came to the ladies and laying their Game, and Quincy was no exception either! They all were really fun and exciting to be around so whenever women got in their presence, naturally they would get caught up in all moment of being around all of these charming and charismatic guys! You know with Daryl’s character he was kind of like the baby boy to his cousin Quincy and his older brother Big Earl. So when they came up he was following from behind so to speak. However as time passed when he actually became a leader in his own right, where as before Quincy would’ve been like oh that’s just my little cousin or Earl might’ve been like that’s just my little brother. But it got to a point where they wanted to deny Darryl his stripes because of sibling rivalry or just to get up under Daryl’s skin. But after a while Quincy and Big Earl had to respect Darryl’s come up because the facts spoke for themselves. He had just that many women catering to his every whim! Man you know some cats put work in on their Mack game behind closed doors and it comes out in the light, and then other cats don’t have to search for the Game because they just have it! That was Darryl; his character was just an all-star when it came to the Game! The funny thing is Darryl’s character would literally have women breaking their necks trying to get to him or at him in passing! It was truly something special to see!
BOTG: What do you think of the feminist movement?
JS: Well let me say for starters that I’m all for equal rights as it pertains to women being treated fairly in the world and the workplace. I mean how you gone call our sister’s Queens and then get mad at them for wanting to come up? Which ultimately is what we all want. I do think that unfortunately as with all things you are always going to have some people who take things to the extreme and don’t know when to stop. Which at that point a movement like that can start to indirectly hinder the very people who are for it. Case in point is some of the women who are constantly screaming and yelling, “I can’t find a good a man!” But lets be truthful; nobody pulled that sister to the side to tell her that in the process of her starting her movement she lost sight of the cause and allowed her own bitterness to become her motive. So now that particular woman will probably never be married or find a good man, because inadvertently she has become a man! What straight man, square or playa wants that around? None that I know.
BOTG: What do you think of the interaction between men and women today?
JS: I think that it’s better than the media hypes it up to be. Certainly in the African American community we still have areas to improve on. You know Gorgeous Dre said his father taught him that you’ve got to be a man before anything else, and I believe a lot young brothers got hyped into some image, and as result have no idea how to be a man. I mean how can you be a playa and you don’t have your own business in order??? Sometimes there is a time to just be real and stop trying to game on one another so much. You know I was looking at Judge Mathis the other day and this woman took these young guy to court because the dude was trying to Mack at her, but really just mooched on her and took her money! You see that’s where I mean, stop trying to game on each other all the time. First of all if this guy had any game he wouldn’t even be with a woman that was an Indian giver! Lmao That’s a new one for me too! Lol So these wanna be playas is getting their feelings hurt because instead of being true to the Game, they so busy trying to cut corners and get over. So I think both men and women need to be real with it each and themselves. You know a PIMP ain’t going for certain things because right from the gate he has already established himself for what he is! So any female that chooses him is co-signing what ever comes along with that lifestyle. I know guys like that. They make sure to differentiate themselves from any square behaviour because the woman choosing him has got to be down for his game. On the other hand if a man and women are just kicking it then they still need to be real because most of the time as I’ve learned, your Game is always a reflection of you. To break that down, your Game is a mirror of you. I’ve seen guys who call themselves “playas” run around with a lot of women, but then if he catches one of his women with “one” dude, out goes that playa card! He’s now acting a fool. So be true to yourself and others, and the Game will be true to you.
BOTG: When approaching a woman, what is the first thing a man must do? (How you hooked up with Kerry was smooth).
JS: Lmao smiling Bruh, I’m cream puffing how you just asked me that one! Now that’s Game! Lmao I can dig it! That’s cold! With Quincy’s character he just felt her (Kerry) out, and sucked her in. You know that entire circle of brothers was just soaking wet with Game! Quincy was no exception. He was constantly soaking up Game from ‘Money Black’ who he revered as a Major Playa! Personally one of the things that I learned is just to feel things out. You know every woman is different so you wanna get rid of the cookie cutter approach lines! Let that go, and tailor make your game and what you say for every woman. Every woman is different but yet the same. So you’ve got to know how to pick up on that in the blink of eye and use it to your advantage. Truthfully the first thing I say to a woman is “Hi”. Now some square will hear that and say, “Where is the Game in that?” To another square he would be right, but to a playa he would be wrong. Because just from her reply, if I even initiate any conversation with her at all, it’s already told me everything that I need to know. Does she have baggage or anger issues with men? Or is she sweet, career minded, ambitious and paid. Really that’s how I treat my Game; I tailor make it for the customer and I can’t go wrong!
BOTG: Lol, it was real smooth. Upon approaching a woman, what is the first thing you usually say?
JS: Normally just a simple “Hi, how you doing?” (It works wonders).
BOTG: What made you decide to be a motivational speaker?
JS: Just seeing the impact that I could have when I used my energy in positive way. I’ve had people who may have said one thing to me, and it got me going in a totally different direction in life. I think when we find our way or a better way that we know can be beneficial to others, its selfish to keep it all to ourselves. Especially when we know it could benefit others. I mean just like Brotherhood Of The Game its great! One of the reasons why you have so many women who are dissatisfied with the current status quote for men is because you had several generations of men in our community who were not there for their sons. So that father to son wisdom by and large didn’t get passed down, which left a vacancy of young men not being guided into manhood let alone being able to learn and join The Brotherhood Of The Game.
BOTG: What is your advice or suggestion to an up and coming motivational speaker?
JS: I tell them to be prepared to make a lifelong commitment to it. It’s not just as easy as many people think that it is. Just like with anything else in life, what you put into it is what you’ll get out of it. Also look into joining an organization like Toastmasters International so you can learn how to speak with confidence in front of massive crowds. Learn everything you can learn from the people that are the best, and then begin to take action to make it happen. Because where your mind goes your behind will follow!
BOTG: You and your brothers teased each other a lot to the point of revealing secrets. Would you say this is a positive thing for any unity?
JS: No. A secret is meant to be kept a secret. Quincy, Big Earl, Darryl and the entire gang were notorious for getting agitated with one another and then sharing the secret just to high side on one another. In their case they were extremely close, literally they grew up from the sandbox together so they could viciously attack each other without it getting too out of control. In My Brothers & I: Jealousy Is As Cruel As The Grave the brothers would go in so hard joking on each other that sometimes it would turn into a feeding frenzy! Which at that point when somebody’s getting roasted non-stop they feel like they got to do whatever to back you up off of them, so they start pulling out the big guns (secrets)! I guess it could be a positive or a negative just given the scenario and the family! Lol.
BOTG: Would you say that if all the teasing didn’t resurface while going through the fight with one of your brothers that you would have been less angry?
JS: Yes, because that’s what happens. You think about every wrong thing the person ever said or did to you when you’re angry. You don’t typically recall all the good times or things that they’ve said. For that reason alone anger is truly detrimental, it fogs our mind and clouds our reasoning.
BOTG: Give your definition of a nice guy.
JS: My definition of a nice is the guy who is going to go along with every single thing a woman says and does just to be in her good graces. He’s like a yes man on wheels for a women! Lmao
BOTG: Is it good to be nice?
JS: It’s good to be genuine. In terms of Game & women. No.
BOTG: Why do you think most women love thugs?
JS: I don’t think most women love thugs. I think you had a period of time when that was the fad. Because now that’s kind of played for a cat to even refer to himself as a thug. Money Black’s character at one point in time was a thug, but even he elevated his status to that of a Gangsta, because he became a boss. I think most women who didn’t know what a real man was clinged to the first thing that resembled one in any shape, size or form of what a man is supposed to be; which is strong. Most women however do love the raw energy allot of playas have. I think it’s just the allure of the game, especially when you’re in the Life. It’s an actual curiosity into the dark side of the Game that intrigues so many women.
BOTG: How’s your relationship with your parents now? Everything okay?
JS: You learn to love people unconditionally. So people you love may not fit your mold of the world, but you got to make a choice. Are you going to stop loving them just because they have flaws and have some wrong choices, or are you going to take the high road and forgive, and learn to love your loved ones in spite of their shortcomings. Sometimes in life we all need to make allowances, but we’re cool, and God is Good.
BOTG: When is your new book ‘The Millionaire Mind Frame: How To Stop Failing & Uncover The Path To Money & Success, coming out?
JS: Prosperous & Prominent Media wants to have it available by the spring of 2014. At the earliest it will be mid March, and at the latest at the first of April. I’m really excited to share that book because I know it has the potential to impact a lot of lives, and the book promises to help people make more money & accomplish more in life.
BOTG: What inspired you to start writing it?
JS: A desire to help others learn more about money and finances, in addition to helping people re-program themselves surrounding their feelings and beliefs about money and wealth. Too many people feel like money is bad or feel undeserving of it, and as a result they never quite have enough. I wanted to share what I’ve learned from rich people firsthand in this book. We have a lot really rich and successful people sharing their wisdom and insight in the book. So the book takes your first hand inside a “Millionaire’s Mind Frame”, and I guarantee that anyone who reads it will have a totally changed mindset about money and success when they finish the book.
BOTG: What is the secret to flipping?
JS: Flipping chicks or houses? Lol No I’m only kidding! Flipping houses can be very lucrative, but you better do your homework and know what you’re doing before you get started, because people can and do lose money with flipping. A lot of people got hit hard when the economy crashed, because they didn’t have anyone to sell to, and they got stuck with whatever properties they had bought to flip! So my advice is to buy one, flip one, and if all else fails you can rent out that property and still make money.
BOTG: LOL. What are your views on marriage? And what is your advice or suggestion to anyone about to get married?
JS: Marriage can be a great thing, but it’s not for everybody. Sometimes people who have no business getting married, get married for the wrong reasons and it’s like two sticks of dynamite. We knew it was going to blow, and anyone with common sense knew too! Yet nobody said a thing! In order for a marriage to work both people have got to be equally yoked and on the same page. If one person still wants to hang with the guys or girls ‘every night’ doing the same single person things it probably won’t work. However when two people come together in love and unity, there’s nothing they can’t accomplish as a husband and wife. My suggestion for people thinking about getting married is to sit down and ask your self, “Am I willing to ‘sacrifice’ the single life for the married life?” Also you’ve got to learn how to communicate effectively in a marriage.
BOTG: You had your parents together the whole time, how important do you feel having your parents made the man you are today?
JS: Very important because certain things that I would’ve done that my partners was doing I didn’t do because I was scared that my pops would go up against my head! Lol. I probably was more scared of him than if I did a prison bid! Lol. But then again that goes to show why having a two-parent house hold is very important. I know that kids don’t get to choose that, because most of my friends didn’t have their father. Yet I can truthfully say that with as much stuff as I got into, I normally knew when to stop or reel it back in. Had I not had my father around I could’ve easily ended up like so many of that guys that I knew.
BOTG: What would be your advice or suggestion to single parents?
JS: Know that yours kids do as you do, not as you say. So telling them what to do is not as nearly as important as what they see you (the parent) doing. Children model what they see their parents doing, also be careful what you say to them because your words carry tons of weight in their lives. I’ve known women who were raising kids by themselves and would tell guys that they don’t bring allot of men around their kids. These women didn’t want their kids to pick up a bad message; they loved themselves and their children so much that they wouldn’t allow everyone around their kids. I respect that a great deal because it showed me that these women valued not only themselves, but their most precious as gift as well; their kids.
BOTG: Describe confidence, this is what a man has to have; tell us how can he generate it.
JS: Confidence is knowing you can do it, plain and simple. You have no doubt about it. Almost like if I said, “ Hey can you tie your shoe?” Without even thinking about it you’d say yes! That’s confidence, and the good thing about it is that anybody can get it! The best way to get confident at something is by doing it. The more you do it the better you get, until it becomes like second nature. Also fly with the eagles, find the people that are the best at it and follow their blueprint, no need to reinvent the wheel!
BOTG: What do you think men are doing wrong with women these days?
JS: I mean if you believe that something is wrong. I won’t say that we (men) are doing something wrong. I think mainstream society and the media as well have had their hay day of bashing black men. I think we can always improve, and on that note I would tell any of my brothers out there reading this not to let anybody else determine your limitations in life. We all are so full of untapped potential. God has gifted us all in so many different areas of life. We only need tap into our greatness to begin to reach for our dreams. So I would say love yourself, and you’ll love others, set goals and you can achieve them, and be a man about his business first and foremost, and now society has to respect you. Other than that I would say stop bending over backwards for every woman who you’re trying get with. Trust me when you do start acting like a man she’ll start treating you like one, but as long as a guy is jumping at the d.o.a.d (drop of a dime) these women are going to treat you just like that! A dropped dime that she will not stop to pick up! You’ve got to have principles man; in the book this is what got DJ.
BOTG: How should a man deal with fear of approach, fear of negative feedback from women and fear in general and overcoming it?
JS: Just get over it. Not to sound simplistic, but by human nature, nobody likes rejection. Not even women, especially not women. Rejection is a part of the game, the reality is most of us are not going to get every single thing that we want in life. Second, make up your mind to not take it personally, because most of the time its not you. Think about it, if you approached a married woman and asked her out, but she said no, you wouldn’t feel rejected because you know she’s committed to her marriage, so its nothing personal most times when people experience rejection. Sometimes we just tend to internalize it that way. Another is to roll out with a partner(s) you admire and model them, if they’ve got game it’s going to rub off on you. Then also it helps to have a circle of guys who encourage one another instead of discourage and clown on you if you having an off night. I mean not even Michael Jordan shot 100% from the field, and when he didn’t Scottie Pippen picked up the slack.
BOTG: Do you still do music? If not, what changed?
Not anymore but I still love music. I think I changed, and just wanted to go in a different direction in life.
BOTG: What are your thoughts on male groups like this one trying to influence and empower men to be leaders in their relationships?
JS: I think it’s great because I know for a fact that that’s really what women want more of. Not the passive type of man who scared to call shots and make decisions. A call to leadership is great. I mean who wants to follow a leader who doesn’t know where he’s going in life? Also BOTG, is a much needed meeting ground from anyone looking for Game, to guys who want to be recognized for their Game. The site really does get allot of respect for resurrecting certain principles, playas, and aspects of the Game that allot of guys just didn’t get.
BOTG: You’ve got another book coming out; ‘Money Black; A Vivid Portrayal Of One Of The Greatest Hustlers That Ever Lived’, what influences did Money Black have on you to be inspired to write this book?
JS: Wow, you know what, as odd as it sounds Money Blacks Character was the type to not let you get overly involved in the underworld. He knew he had more potential and that his friends did too. So he really wasn’t the type of person to say get with this, if anything he was the type to tell you to go back to school and get your college degree. He was raised in the dope game, so that was all he really knew-hustling. Even still he was highly intelligent and not what society paints every hustler out to be, a monster. Readers will find out how live ‘Money Black’ really was, once we get that project finished. That brother was like a magnet for money, and I guarantee you that book is going to be dangerous!
BOTG: Has a woman ever said no when you approached and then changed her mind?
JS: Yes because women are fickle about any, and everything. The question that’s most important is if I’d give her a pass on not acting on her better judgement. See I’m glad you asked that because for any guy reading this I want them to get this through their head, women can and do play allot of the same games that men play. Your job is to figure out what she really wants, and if it fits into your agenda.
BOTG: What do you think a woman needs or wants most from a man?
JS: Aww man you ask some great questions for the readers bro. Without giving away too much game for free, a woman wants you to have your priorities in order. Because what this says to her he’s got it together, this is why you can see a ugly fat dude, in a Mercedes Benz s class riding with a dime piece while Joe blow is over there on the sideline hating his heart out! Lmao. Women are wired differently from men bro, and what men ‘typically’ value (beauty & booty) is not what women value. So choose the money and in turn they’ll chose you! (It’s gone be some playas mad that I’m giving away game like this, but hey that’s what makes this site authentic ya dig?).
BOTG: Do you think that things would have been different if DJ or Lilia never entered your lives?
JS: For Quincy, yea I do. Because in a way he connected Darryl and Lilia when to Darryl she was just another option. Which maybe in some way Quincy’s character felt guilty about, but at the end of the day things happened the way they did, and everything does happen for a reason, and for people who read the book they’ll realize that some good did come from Darryl’s relationship with Lilia.
BOTG: What do you think destroys bonds no matter how strong?
JS: Trust and betrayal. Without trust you really won’t have a bond, let alone a relationship. You’ve got to have trust in any relationship or it probably will not be a strong relationship.
BOTG: What is the most important thing to remember about Jovie Sumner?
JS: Love, loyalty and ambition. In addition to having a sincere desire in helping other people become better and succeed in life.
BOTG: What do you do now?
JS: I write fictional and self help books, so make sure to look out for “The Millionaire Mind Frame: How To Stop Failing & Uncover Your Path To Money & Success” available this spring 2014. I also consult with other’s who want to write books and build their business, as well as speak, educate, and motivate!
BOTG: What are your future plans?
JS: To continue to sell, sell, sell, and then sell some more! Lol. In all seriousness to continue to promote our website www.joviescorner.com, continue to build Prosperous & Prominent Media, LLC into a internationally recognized brand, help as many people as I can to accomplish their goals and dreams, and show them how they can do it and make a lot of money in the process!
BOTG: Thank you.